For the unemployed homeless...

I pay attention to the referrers that bring people to this site, especially the search strings. Lately I have seen something in the logs that breaks my heart: Lots of people are looking for things like "unemployed and homeless."

I've never actually been homeless myself, thank Goddess, but I do have some idea of what it must be like due to some tramp-style rough travelling as a young man. That's kind of like being voluntarily homeless for a few weeks or months -- you never know where you're going to sleep or what you're going to eat. I also know what it's like to look the real thing in the face because I've been narrowly avoiding it for the past six months or so, scrambling each month to come up with enough money to make my rent and bills.

In those moments of intense anxiety when it feels like I might not make it, I always tell myself one thing: Lots of people have survived homelessness, and you will too if it comes to that. For those newly homeless people surfing in here from libraries and shelters, that's all I can offer in the way of consolation, unfortunately.

The truth of the matter is that this is a horrible time to be on the street. In better economic times, it is easier to recover from homelessness; homeless services are better funded, and some sort of crappy job is usually available. Nowadays, a lot of cities are cutting back on their programs, and privately funded programs are also strapped. Making matters worse, a job is the impossible dream for a lot of people. If getting a job when rested, bathed, and fed is hard, how hard must it be for someone who can't get a good night's sleep, a decent shower or a decent meal? It has to be the ultimate suck.

It hurts me physically to think about this. Nausea burbles in my belly, and my chest tightens. Millions of homeless people, many of them children, and empty buildings everywhere you look -- how can this be? Why is this nation -- supposedly "the richest country in the world" -- not totally ashamed of itself at this point? We're spending hundreds of billions of dollars every year to bomb and kill poor people in other countries and abandoning our own poor and (formerly) working people. "Outrageous" is not strong enough. No mere word suffices to describe this ignominy. Proud to be an American? What a joke.

(Sorry for that little foray into political Rantville. I just can't help myself sometimes -- I get mighty pissed off.)

To the homeless, especially those who never really saw it coming, I just want to say this:

Have faith. Keep moving. Keep yourself clean. Take full advantage of whatever programs your area offers. Maintain your dignity. Don't despair too much. Most of all, don't lose hope. It will get better. It can't get much worse, right?

I know that's kind of lame, but I don't know what else to say.

Best of luck.

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Much Easier In Rural Areas

I've been unemployed and homeless before when I lived in the mountains in North Carolina. Those were actually some of the best times of my life, for varied reasons, despite living in my car and eating out of a can (literally eating a can of tuna or something over a period of a week or so at a time). Right now I'm again looking at the prospects of homelessness, despite having a fairly strong work history in retail management, manufacturing, and warehousing. The only difference; I'm in a big city in Ohio right now. I really do not look forward to it if it comes as people in cities tend to be far more apathetic, and nature cannot possibly provide you with even the bare essentials like clean drinking water; everything is contaminated here with oil, gas, and pollution. The homeless get persecuted heartlessly and without mercy, and programs for the homeless are an abject joke even in the best of times.

Looks like I'll need to make another move somehow if things go any further south.

chuck's picture

I suppose...

... it would be easier in the rural areas, but it's never easy. Good luck to you.

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

The American Holocaust. Thousands of Homeless Disappear!

The American Holocaust. Thousands of Homeless Disappear!

http://homeless-disappear.blogspot.com

chuck's picture

Paranoid

I've been hearing about these death camps for 20 years. Sometimes they're run by aliens, sometimes by the Illuminati, sometimes by an ultra-secret CIA cabal, but whoever is in charge must be pretty incompetent because:

a) They're not very good at keeping the secret since I reckon just about everybody has heard these tales by now

and

b) They just can't seem to get the party started. Y2K came and went, and what did they do rather than let chaos rule? Hired a bunch of Fortran programmers and fixed it. Pshaw! How disappointing was that! 9/11 turned out to be a dud in the "Round 'em up and send 'em to the camps!" department. The current economic meltdown hasn't given the wheels on the Deathcampmobile much traction. I mean, what's it gonna take to get these things rolling? Nuclear armageddon? At that point, does it really matter?

No, I mean, I'm with you that the situation is dire and that the forces of evil never back down unless challenged, but fear does nobody any good.

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

You know..if you really care

You know..if you really care why don't you actually do something??? You obviously have a home...offer a room to an unemployed homeless person!

chuck's picture

We do what we can.

I wish I could do that. Your point is a good one, though: Actions are what matter.

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

Angela J. Shirley's picture

LOL

Hi Chuck:

I read the post you are responding to with amusement.

What do people think, this is a "free" ride for everyone?

So when you give this room to someone that is unemployed, how are you expected to pay your bills plus theirs?

I am homeless and will not stay with anyone unless I can pay my way. For example, where I am staying temporarily - I pay 1/3 of everything because there are 3 of us. And yes, I get the couch because they are set up for just the 2 of them (lol).

Yes, some people are quick to judge and tell other folks what to do. Let EACH person decide what they want to do to help another person out.

Anyway, Chuck - keep up the great site :)

Angela

Angela J. Shirley,How I Keep Income In My Life!

RE:If you really cared........

Here is a little story for those that continue to defend the less fortunate. Me and my husband tried a little project of our own. Thinking, since our children are grown and gone and we have this big ole house all to ourselves. Why not take in borders free of charge (homeless or those about to be) and help them situate their lives. We offered free room and board, help to get their birth certificate, SS card, ID of some sort. Help to possibly find a job. And all they would have to do is cooperate. Meaning not to turn down job offers and we would feed, clothe, shelter, and inspire them to lift their chin up and things would get better over time. But NOT one time did we get taken up on our offer. NOT once.

Several persons told us they didn't want to take us up on the offer due to having to find a job. Even though there was no time frame given. Only that they seek work and don't turn anything down. Go Figure. And four others didn't want to take us up on the offers due to no drinking,smoking, or partying of any kind allowed on our property. Aside from smoking. We would allow that outside.

There were a few other reasons given, like one person said no way..... That's too far from the inner city. And another said they needed their "Contacts" within walking distance. haha. I knew what that meant.

We made this offer on the internet, then took it locally to the streets. And even called two shelters and asked for referrals of two to three persons in a family X two that needed shelter and help. To no avail. One shelter said referrals were not allowed. The other said it would be in our best interest not to offer such to the homeless and said quote "Most cannot be trusted".

I couldn't agree more. I've learned a lesson with this and that is you have to look out for number one. Cause the rest don't give a **** about you or anyone else.

Sad World!

Most are homeless because of the road they chose to take in life. Some are homeless due to bad choices and a streak of bad luck. But most can change that... they choose not to!

Driving locally I see the same man year after year on the same corner of the exit ramp from the highway with the same sign. I've twice offered him work for pay. He declined. I've given him a large iced tea that he accepted. I've taken him one meal that he accepted. But he will not work for food or money. He will only accept cash donations. He was just there yesterday, I didn't offer anything, nor will I ever again!

chuck's picture

I'm skeptical

Let me be frank: It sounds like you are biased against the homeless.

In this age of Craig's List Killers, I wouldn't take anyone up on free lodging, even if I was homeless. I would also be cautious about getting in a stranger's car.

If you want to help the homeless, why not volunteer at a shelter? Hear their stories. Many of them do have addiction and other mental health issues. (For this reason I think you would have to be insane to put an ad on the internet offering free housing to the homeless in your home.) Many of them are people who lost jobs and houses.

"Judge not lest ye be judged."

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

Re: offer of room for homeless

Posting here is my last hope. I have been searching for help for some time now and just read your post. I live in California but i will take your offer in a heartbeat if it is still open. 

I need to explain why so that other people can understand why some of us are in this position.  I see no reason to continue my life at this point. It feels like my life is over and nothing short of a miracle will help me at this point. 

My llife is so different now and no one is here to help. No one until I saw this post at least and I see no other way to stop what is happening. I've gone to shelters but have no children so i am not on the priority list. The programs available are a joke. They offer nothing to most people because resources are already stretched to thin. I went to social services and tried to collect welfare. You would think that being homeless qualifies a person, well not here in California. There would be a a check of 249.00 for three months but only if I have recently left prison and I was in a county drug program. I've never been to prison and I have never used drugs so I can't qualify. I went to the ER and said I was suicidal and at one hospital was referred to social services center the next day and released. At another I was given a place to sleep for 3 days and released.  I just wanted to bathe and feel safe for a few days & try to get into some type of shelter or program. Nothing was offered because nothing is available.

No one cares and I don't have children so I am not at the top of the help list in the US. Things are getting worse by the day in this country.  I've prayed to my mother and father to look down and help me but no help came. I don't believe in God anymore cause God sure stopped believing in me. I went to local churches looking for help and was sent away because I wasn't a parishioner. There is no God and I'm already in hell and my mom and dad can't hear me so there is no help. 

Where do you go when you have no programs  in this country to give you a hand up when you truly need it. There is supposed to be help available. I've worked all my life, paid taxes, did everything by the book & never turned down a job in my life. Because I did the right thing I am now in this position. I worked hard all my life & yet barely got by on a daily basis.   There don't seem to be resources available for people who truly need help and are willing to help themselves if only they can catch a break, even if it is just for a week.

This is why I am homeless:

I'm a 41 year old woman. not very young, not too old but I felt like I have no other option but to end my life. I worked as a manager for years. Then I lost my job. So for years I have had 5 part times jobs. That's right FIVE! Sometimes I worked up to 300+ hours a month. No exaggeration. I live in Orange County California and those of you in the area know it is not cheap to live here. Every penny counted. Christmas was my busiest time of the year and by January things started to slow down a bit. Enough so I could catch my breath. One night in January I decided I would finally go out after work. I figured I would have a drink and take a break for an hour or two. I had 2 1/2 drinks. But when your aren't use to drinking it effects you. I decided I was going to sleep in my car until I was sober enough to drive.

25 minutes later police knock on the window and go through the whole sobriety deal with me. I explained I wasn't driving but the key was in the ignition and the heat was on in the car, my seat was reclined so it was obvious I wasn't driving but he claimed he had a right. I blew a .09. Legal limit in Cali is .08. I begged him not to arrest me or I would lose my jobs. ( I drove from various locations within Orange County and LA county for each of the jobs I had). I was not able to have one of these jobs without a valid license and certainly not with a DUI conviction. Besides I could barely afford to get my car out of impound let alone an attorney for the charges. Ultimately I had no option but to take a plea from the DA's office. It was the minimum required for a DUI in Orange County. This advice was from my public defender and I felt seriously screwed but with no other option I took it. The judge passed sentence and pleaded that I wasn't driving but the state and county make loads of money this way and my case was just another kaching in the county's bank account.

I lost my jobs,  Unemployment denied me benefits because I signed paperwork stating a valid license is necessary for employment. No money means no home, no car & no future. I can't get my license until I pay for a DUI school but that cost 579.00. Not to mention the 2000.00 in fines I have to pay and they tack on additional cost for an alcohol liaison fee, DNA collection fee, MADD lecture and then pay for an SR-22 in California if I ever could get another car again. I've even tried getting arrested because I can't pay the penalties and because of overcrowding I was released and given an extension. Unbelievable!

I made 179.00 last month. I do not qualify for welfare assistance in California because I have no children and because I made 179.00 last month and have some employment it is another reason I cannot qualify for cash assistance. I receive 90.00 in food stamps a month. But with no where to live I find myself eating anything that doesn't require cooking. That doesn't really make the 90.00 stretch very far.  I have no where to live. I now look like all those people you pass on the street.

I was living in my car but it died, was booted and towed away. I have an iPod touch that I am writing this on. The screen is cracked but I can still kinda see what the screen says. I've tried to sell it but no one wants it and it has been my only lifeline to the normal world. Every now and again I can charge it at the library  and then sit outside staples or anywhere they have free wifi and apply for jobs or try to contact people.

 My family are all dead. I have no friends, never really did have too many and those I do know aren't in a much better position. All have said they can't help and not one has even offered me a floor to sleep on for a night.

I've tried to not give up, I really have but I can't take anymore. No one seems to care.  No one wants to even look you in the eye. I don't ask for help anymore. The people I once knew have said no so often I feel sympathy for them now. Its hard to turn away someone when your own survival is at stake every month. I know how they feel. They don't want to be put in the position and I am tired of crying about it afterward.

I just want this to stop. I don't know any other way then death. Things are so bad now I don't know if I can come back from this and then I read your post. it gave me hope that someone, somewhere might be able to help.

 Being homeless is terrible. I've been beaten, spit at, laughed at and told to get a job so many times and it crushes me everytime. You aren't looked at as human any longer and when you sleep on the street with rats and filth, you don't feel human anymore. You don't know until you are there. Next time you pass someone, even if you can't help them, at least smile and say hello. We are human and we are just trying to survive. We understand you can't help financially, believe me we do understand. But a friendly word and smile helps. For me, at this point, I don't know if I can get back to where I was before but I keep trying everyday to feel hope again. 

Please send a reply.  I hope the offer is still there. Thank you for trying to help people. We need it but sometimes don't know it exists.

Posting here is my last hope.

Posting here is my last hope. I have been searching for help for some time now and just read your post. I live in California but i will take your offer in a heartbeat if it is still open. 

I need to explain why so that other people can understand why some of us are in this position.  I see no reason to continue my life at this point. It feels like my life is over and nothing short of a miracle will help me at this point. 

My llife is so different now and no one is here to help. No one until I saw this post at least and I see no other way to stop what is happening. I've gone to shelters but have no children so i am not on the priority list. The programs available are a joke. They offer nothing to most people because resources are already stretched to thin. I went to social services and tried to collect welfare. You would think that being homeless qualifies a person, well not here in California. There would be a a check of 249.00 for three months but only if I have recently left prison and I was in a county drug program. I've never been to prison and I have never used drugs so I can't qualify. I went to the ER and said I was suicidal and at one hospital was referred to social services center the next day and released. At another I was given a place to sleep for 3 days and released.  I just wanted to bathe and feel safe for a few days & try to get into some type of shelter or program. Nothing was offered because nothing is available.

No one cares and I don't have children so I am not at the top of the help list in the US. Things are getting worse by the day in this country.  I've prayed to my mother and father to look down and help me but no help came. I don't believe in God anymore cause God sure stopped believing in me. I went to local churches looking for help and was sent away because I wasn't a parishioner. There is no God and I'm already in hell and my mom and dad can't hear me so there is no help. 

Where do you go when you have no programs  in this country to give you a hand up when you truly need it. There is supposed to be help available. I've worked all my life, paid taxes, did everything by the book & never turned down a job in my life. Because I did the right thing I am now in this position. I worked hard all my life & yet barely got by on a daily basis.   There don't seem to be resources available for people who truly need help and are willing to help themselves if only they can catch a break, even if it is just for a week.

This is why I am homeless:

I'm a 41 year old woman. not very young, not too old but I felt like I have no other option but to end my life. I worked as a manager for years. Then I lost my job. So for years I have had 5 part times jobs. That's right FIVE! Sometimes I worked up to 300+ hours a month. No exaggeration. I live in Orange County California and those of you in the area know it is not cheap to live here. Every penny counted. Christmas was my busiest time of the year and by January things started to slow down a bit. Enough so I could catch my breath. One night in January I decided I would finally go out after work. I figured I would have a drink and take a break for an hour or two. I had 2 1/2 drinks. But when your aren't use to drinking it effects you. I decided I was going to sleep in my car until I was sober enough to drive.

25 minutes later police knock on the window and go through the whole sobriety deal with me. I explained I wasn't driving but the key was in the ignition and the heat was on in the car, my seat was reclined so it was obvious I wasn't driving but he claimed he had a right. I blew a .09. Legal limit in Cali is .08. I begged him not to arrest me or I would lose my jobs. ( I drove from various locations within Orange County and LA county for each of the jobs I had). I was not able to have one of these jobs without a valid license and certainly not with a DUI conviction. Besides I could barely afford to get my car out of impound let alone an attorney for the charges. Ultimately I had no option but to take a plea from the DA's office. It was the minimum required for a DUI in Orange County. This advice was from my public defender and I felt seriously screwed but with no other option I took it. The judge passed sentence and pleaded that I wasn't driving but the state and county make loads of money this way and my case was just another kaching in the county's bank account.

I lost my jobs,  Unemployment denied me benefits because I signed paperwork stating a valid license is necessary for employment. No money means no home, no car & no future. I can't get my license until I pay for a DUI school but that cost 579.00. Not to mention the 2000.00 in fines I have to pay and they tack on additional cost for an alcohol liaison fee, DNA collection fee, MADD lecture and then pay for an SR-22 in California if I ever could get another car again. I've even tried getting arrested because I can't pay the penalties and because of overcrowding I was released and given an extension. Unbelievable!

I made 179.00 last month. I do not qualify for welfare assistance in California because I have no children and because I made 179.00 last month and have some employment it is another reason I cannot qualify for cash assistance. I receive 90.00 in food stamps a month. But with no where to live I find myself eating anything that doesn't require cooking. That doesn't really make the 90.00 stretch very far.  I have no where to live. I now look like all those people you pass on the street.

I was living in my car but it died, was booted and towed away. I have an iPod touch that I am writing this on. The screen is cracked but I can still kinda see what the screen says. I've tried to sell it but no one wants it and it has been my only lifeline to the normal world. Every now and again I can charge it at the library  and then sit outside staples or anywhere they have free wifi and apply for jobs or try to contact people.

 My family are all dead. I have no friends, never really did have too many and those I do know aren't in a much better position. All have said they can't help and not one has even offered me a floor to sleep on for a night.

I've tried to not give up, I really have but I can't take anymore. No one seems to care.  No one wants to even look you in the eye. I don't ask for help anymore. The people I once knew have said no so often I feel sympathy for them now. Its hard to turn away someone when your own survival is at stake every month. I know how they feel. They don't want to be put in the position and I am tired of crying about it afterward.

I just want this to stop. I don't know any other way then death. Things are so bad now I don't know if I can come back from this and then I read your post. it gave me hope that someone, somewhere might be able to help.

 Being homeless is terrible. I've been beaten, spit at, laughed at and told to get a job so many times and it crushes me everytime. You aren't looked at as human any longer and when you sleep on the street with rats and filth, you don't feel human anymore. You don't know until you are there. Next time you pass someone, even if you can't help them, at least smile and say hello. We are human and we are just trying to survive. We understand you can't help financially, believe me we do understand. But a friendly word and smile helps. For me, at this point, I don't know if I can get back to where I was before but I keep trying everyday to feel hope again. 

Please send a reply.  I hope the offer is still there. Thank you for trying to help people. We need it but sometimes don't know it exists.

chuck's picture

I want to help you

I've heard a lot of stories but yours really crushed me.

Please don't end your life. Things are bad now but they will get better. Many people have come back from homelessness. You will too.

Contact me through this site and I will do everything I can to help you, including contacting the person who wrote the comment above to see if they're willing to walk the walk and give you a hand.

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

What area of the country are

What area of the country are you in? I would give my right arm for what you offered. I dont do drugs, or drink. I am a victim of abuse and losing my job at the same time. I would appreciate any help you gave the ppl who did not want to get back to living normally. uhg...

Re: Re: I you really cared . . .

It is a shame that people refused the hep that you and your husband offered. It only takes one or two to spoil a good sentiment and unfortunately this is often the case.
I apologize for the spirit of some people. It is people like such as they who aid in turning people bitter.

99rs

My boyfriend and I are middle aged, unemployment benefits exhausted and now homeless. I don't know what to do, where to turn to. Homeless shelters are scary and not for the "used to be middle class and now homeless". They are designed for the perpetually homesless, mentally ill homeless, substance abuse homeless and domestic violence homeless. I've never seen anything like this nor have I lived it. Some days suicide seems like the only solution!

chuck's picture

Susan, that is no solution at all

The stongest steel is forged in the hottest fire. When you get through this, you are going to be so strong that it will amaze and inspire everyone around you. You will get through this. You will.

I know several people who have struggled through periods of homelessness and come out ahead.

Please do not opt out of this life. The only thing I know for sure about life is that it changes, and in my case, the greatest challenges, the times when I thought about throwing in the towel, have always turned out to be blessings.

Be strong! Have faith. You are now seeing and living horrible times, but this will make you a more resourceful and compassionate person in the end. When you come out the other side of this, you will be full of gratitude and joy just to have a roof over your head. You will learn to appreciate life again as you never have before. This is a promise.

Hang in there, sister!

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

Hang in there?? That's what

Hang in there?? That's what most of us have done for the last 2 years. We have 2 kids, no jobs, and the home we were renting is days from forclosure.

I am tired of reading where people just say keep your head up... forget that. I need help and I need it today. Tomorrow will be too late. A struggling family of 4 that used to bring in median income, that is slashed to less than 50% and now where will we live? Can't afford rent (which in my area is atleast 3x's the current mortgage rate), but that's besides the point, who will rent to you when you have UI benefits.

Oh and lets not completely forget the fact that we are a blended family. If we end up homeless, I'm pretty certain my ex would be granted full custody of my 8 year old. How can I live through that?? On top of all this I have crohn's disease and no insurance. Therefore no medications or treatment other than holistic foods. Its a band aid for an 8" gash. The stress of this is killing me, if you have a solution..GREAT! Otherwise all your kind words mean nothing.

Angela J. Shirley's picture

I understand Susan!

I agree with you Susan and I have been in the same situation. Try to figure out ways to find a SAFE place to stay. Have you tried to find work that provides housing? It may not be the ideal situation, but it will give you some time to figure out something better. I am now 52, soon to be 53 - and technically still "homeless & jobless" - but not giving up on find a source of income. What type of work do you and your boyfriend do?

Angela

Angela J. Shirley,How I Keep Income In My Life!

I can relate..Newly Homeless and Unemployed 10 Months..

I am an American born and raised in the USA. I love this country,but I do not like the way the America Employment System is made up of a bunch of individuals who could careless for the average (want to work) hardworking American like myself. I have lost my job, home, and almost all my savings trying to survive in this "sickening, selfish, don't give damn society". One person made a commenton the blog on MSN about the UNEMPLOYED", "to all those who are poor and unemployed get up and get a job," well I want to work, and I do not want to be depending on anyone. I have 20 years experience under my belt, a ollege degree with several certifications, and willing to take a cut, as I have 10 types of resumes but when I send out the one in my career no wants to hire me either I am over qualified, or whatever don't know they don't want me. I take care of appearance and I work out, I am a now homeless female. I have not applied to DSS-Department of Social Services for Food Stamps or other services such as a shelter (I understand they are unsafe). I can't believe I am in this situation. I will be going back to school soon to complete attain a new degree. Just a note to the bashers out there; don't JUDGE ANYONE OUT HERE BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A PERSON HAS BEEN OR GOING THROUGH, or WHAT YOU MAY COME TO!!
I am a strong person...(lady)
December 25th, 2011...Merry Unhappy "XMAS"
Living in the Nations Capital
(WANT TO WORK, CAN’T GET A JOB)
I do thank the LORD for another day....

chuck's picture

I want to repeat this part...

Don't JUDGE ANYONE OUT HERE BECAUSE YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT A PERSON HAS BEEN OR GOING THROUGH, or WHAT YOU MAY COME TO!!

Believe me, a lot of people know exactly how you feel.

Your gratitude is what will pull you through. Best of luck.

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

I'm going to be homeless soon

I went out on medical leave of absence that was approved by my employer to have necessary surgery. They said before I left that I'd be able to come back on light duty two weeks after my surgery. Once I had the surgery my employer said they could no longer offer me light duty, which made me have to stay out two months instead of two weeks. I found out that this was because they needed the time to hire someone else in my absence. HR did not tell me this or return my messages. One of my co-workers sent me a text about the "new girl." Once I confronted HR about this, the HR manager said that she had "tried to contact me" but couldn't because of "problems with the phones." They are offering me a different position for a 40% reduction in pay. If I don't take it they are going to say they offered me work and I refused it so they will deny me unemployment. If I do take the job I will still not be able to make rent so I will be homeless either way. Also, my credit is destroyed and I am being sued because of a worker's comp claim from March (a client I work with attacked me and sent me to the ER) that my job keeps saying they'll pay but they're not doing it. My boyfriend is working his butt off to try to keep us afloat while I apply for jobs (spent five hours today filling out applications and sending resumes) but his car just broke down and the new engine he bought from someone off Craigslist for $350 turned out to not work so we bounced last month's rent check because he was scammed. We have no money and are going to run out of food soon (we are looking in dumpsters for food now) and if I don't find a job by the end of the month we will be homeless. I have a college degree and have been sending out resumes for weeks and have not received one single call. It is hopeless. I told my boyfriend today that I wanted to kill myself and the only reason I wasn't going to was because I know it would upset him - he just lost his kids in a divorce and has no one else. He said if I killed myself he would want to do it with me, but I can't let him do that because even though he doesn't get to see them very often, I couldn't let him end this life with me and leave his three children without a father. I'm hoping that once we lose our home that someone will kill me on the streets so this can all be over. I never wanted much from life - just a modest job and a family, but instead of a modest little house and children, it's all going to end with me dying in the streets. Everything in my life has been for nothing. I am nothing. I don't know why I was even born. My 32nd birthday is in a week and a half and my life is already over. I am dead inside. I only hope that I literally die soon so this can all end. Much love to those of you who are struggling with similar issues.

chuck's picture

Beth, I'm so sorry

I'm so sorry that I missed your comment. I hope that you haven't done anything drastic.

You're 32 -- that's nothing. You're a spring chicken. You're going to be fine. I know it doesn't seem that way right now, but as one who has eaten out of dumpsters, I can tell you that life changes. Five years from now, you might find yourself in that modest little house with a family. Focus your energy there, and take steps every day -- no matter how small they may seem -- toward that goal. You'll get there, but it takes struggle, perseverance, and a sense of hope.

Just hang in there, sister. Some of the greatest people in history have gone through periods of homelessness. It takes a lot of heat, a lot of pressure, and a lot of time to make a diamond.

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

Beth

Hi Beth, I am exactly where you are with the exception I am homeless and unemployed. Please hang on for another day and just take one day at a time. Please! And pray to God every chance you get. Just hold on okay. I thought the very same things you did. I am a in a rut and believe dying has got to be a lot better than living right now. But for some reason I am holding on and praying to God to dig me out of the pit. I know it's horrible. But just hang in there -- thank God you do have a boyfriend I have no one but Jesus... Also, I don't know where you live but try applying at a Q-Trip Convenience Store I know it's the last place you would want to work. But the pay is good. I worked at a Race Trac several years -- I am definitely thinking of doing it again... Take care! I will remember you in my prayers.

homeless and unemployed

i read your post and wanted to share my story. i am a 27 year old man soon to be 28, i have been unemployed for going on 3 years and am applying EVERYWHERE, this includesfast food (which i despise) but am swolloing my pride for...my story is this...3 years ago i was in a relationship with a woman and her 3 boys (pains in my ass but still love them) i lost my job due to health reasons, at almost 25 then i was diagnosed with extreme high blood pressure, i found a new job after that, through a temp service, was working one day when i was served with a restraining order saying that i had beat the woman and her children i was with, i was working the day she claimed i had done this, i went through my mother being beaten while pregnant with my now7 year old sister, grew up learning o respect women and children, never hit a woman a day in my life and this happens. my mother even attested that i was no where near them when it was claimed to have happened, no police reports, no photographic proof. i didnt make the court hearing to fight the charges, the restraining order said 500 feet away at all times, i was living just acrss the street at the time so was packing up and moving 45 minutes away. the judge said i was guilty because i didnt show up, even though i had sent her a letter stating why i wouldnt be there, in the processof moving a sherriff came by the house, placed me in hand cuffs in front of my mother and sister, scared her to death, the officer then proceded to nag me, call me a moron, and say he was arresting me for non compliance of a restraining order. i wasnt arrested, because i promsed him i was leaving then and there, and i did, havent been back in 3 years and never will go back. but because of this restraining order i can NOT find work, because employers are afraid she may come in and tatll bring bad business, i was living with my mother and sister in a 2 bedroom trailer home, but the tightness of the atmosphere meant i had to leave, my mother threw me out because i am a hothead, my new girlfriend took me in, and almost 5 months has gone by, it is just about christmas, my applications are moot again, i havent the money to help with christmas and my medication, the girlfriend and i are always fighting and its because of me...i have an addiction, but it isnt drugs or alcohol, my addiction is that of an online video game, if im not sleeping, or filling out applications im on the game, its gotten to the point that thegirlfriend is considering kicking me out as well, and im unable to change that, job and family services cant help me with food, money, or medical because my son (9 years) isnt in my custody, the only program they have to help m with is to teach me how to make a ressume, which does me no good because im a jack of all trades,landscaping, warehouse, cleaning, telemarketing, pizza parlors, and fast food, but with no contact information for these jobs due to going out of business or moving, and i cant find them, i have no information to put on the ressumes, i want to work, i want to get back on my medications because they actually worked, but no means to do so, i dont want a jobthatll make me a millionaire, just a job thatll mean my family can continue being my family, can continue giving them a roof,and food...no one has made me the person i am today except myself, and i have come to terms with that. i just want to make it known that some people actually fall on hard times, and want to make it change for the better, just not this guy, i will one day make it to where i want my life to be, it jut wont be where i am now, and i will miss the people that are in my life today because of the person i am. truly i am not te greatest person in the world but i thought i was the greatest for this family that i call my own, the feeling just isnt mutual with the girlfriend or anyone else in this world...i now have long cold nights to look forward to and long hot nights just months away, and the outlook isnt good for me

chuck's picture

It's hard to read your comment...

... but I'm leaving it because you're honestly venting and not trying to spam.

All I can tell you is that the only moment that matters is the one you find yourself in. Whatever mistakes you may have made in the past no longer matter. What matters is what you do right now because it will determine the course of the rest of your life. You're only 28. You have plenty of time to turn your situation around and even to be an inspiration to others.

I don't mean to patronize when I offer this advice: You might want to take an English composition class. Just learn to structure your thoughts in writing a bit. It makes your vents easier to read and understand and is a skill that can take you far.

I have to suggest that you turn off the video games too. Take up smoking or something if you must have an addiction...

Best of luck.

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

Catmom's picture

Chuck, smoking really?

Hi Chuck-

I have been employed for about 9 months now, I am happy to say, but I check in here from time to time to see if anyone has posted lately.

I thought I'd contribute something new here by asking Chuck--were you serious in suggesting that the 27 year old guy take up smoking? I do agree that his post was very difficult to read because of his lack of sentence structure, punctuation etc. However, smoking is a killer (my mom died pretty young because of it).

Thanks for keeping the site up, Chuck, even though you have been employed yourself for some time now. I am sure there are still some poor lost souls who it helps when they google "unemployment and depression."

Catmom

chuck's picture

Tongue-in-cheek

But, actually, smoking is probably a better addiction than video games. At least nicotine as anti-depressive and anti-inflammatory qualities. Plus, smokers get plenty of fresh air and vitamin D. Video games don't really provide any benefits.

Of course, nobody should take up smoking, but...

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

Unemployed but not homeless yet

I feel I'm on the path that many of you have traveled. Unlike some of you, I've spent my life being "little miss goody two shoes." I've never drunk alcohol, smoked, gone to a bar, done drugs, been arrested, or done anything profoundly bad. I have a Masters degree in analytical chemistry and worked at the same job for 15 years. For over a year, I've applied to 100 chemistry jobs and 100 non-chemistry jobs (entry level retail, secretarial, and so on). I've had two phone interviews and two in-person interviews but no job. That's it. I've tried to sell things on Ebay; nobody can afford to buy anything. I don't have any friends or human children but lots of animals. If I don't find a way to make money within a year, I'll have to get rid of them. Then, in a few years, I'll be out of money. All I legally own is my car. I'm living with my parents but they're dying and have no money to spare. There seems to be no hope for a future for a lot of us. It seems that empathy and human compassion are gone. And, then when people try to help, the person turns on them. Life sucks.

chuck's picture

Sometimes life does suck.

Far be it from me to deny that. It's the First Noble Truth of the Buddha -- "To live is to suffer."

If you're alive, you're going to experience some hardship. That's the way it is. It's a struggle. If you weren't struggling, you wouldn't get out of bed in the morning.

But, you know, what? Life is also an incredible gift. The odds are astronomically against your having this human consciousness on this miracle of a planet. If you focus on the suffering, that is what will tend to manifest because your internal reality is the real reality. If you focus on the miracle, that will be your reality.

I understand that your finances are tight. Believe me, I've been there, and I wasn't living with my parents. Almost everybody's been there. It's temporary. The only thing that's permanent is change. The Buddha said that too.

If you can believe in anything, you can believe in change. Your life will change for the better, but the first thing that you must change is the only thing you can: your attitude. If you want empathy and compassion, be empathetic and compassionate. If you want hope for the future, it's there for the taking. Why not? Hope is free, and it does no harm. Find it.

Best of luck to you!

When life hands you sh*t, make fertilizer.

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